What The Fuck Is A Millennial? | S Explains It All

First of all, what the fuck even is a millennial? People (mostly old) love to use this word to describe basically everyone under 30. But what does it actually mean?

From what I have gathered from 30-something-year-olds who are jealous of youth, a millennial is:

  1. An in-real-life anti-social human who posts about every meal, outfit, holiday, outing and makeup look on their social media site.
  2. A lazy human who wants to get famous from a viral video or tweet and doesn’t appreciate hard work.
  3. Someone who has no idea that the Internet used to require dial-up and had the iPad before they could walk or talk.

Well, after some research (and general common sense) I can say that this is completely wrong. The real definition of millennial is: “a person reaching young adulthood in the early 21st century.” There has been a lot of debate around when Generation Y came into effect, but a lot of sources claim that the word “millennial” refers to those born in 1980 – 2004. So, all those 30-something-year-olds spouting that annoying “you millennials… in my day” crap are actually in the same boat as us so-called iPhone-toting, social-media-posting, lazy youngins.

I’d like to make it clear that regardless of the actual definition of the word, I don’t like to be referred to as a “millennial”. Why? Because it is always used as an insult. I was born in the era of grunge and Beavis and Butt-Head, and the original PlayStation. And I still don’t even own an iPad! So don’t label me with this millennial bullshit, talking about my social media-obsessed, shallow generation, because my actual generation is the crew that had brick Nokia phones and watched Rugrats and Hey Arnold like their lives depended on it. There’s nothing purer than that.

I also don’t want to be famous, and never post my meals on Instagram (and despise anyone who does. Sorry). This, once again, proves that I don’t fit in with the made-up definition of the millennial.

Stay bodacious my non-millennial, Rugrats enthusiasts.

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