What If You Don’t Have A “Tribe”? | How To Be Happy Series

People are always talking about finding “your tribe”, and to be completely honest, I don’t get it. Your “tribe” is supposed to be a group of good, like-minded friends who you go through life with. Many people claim these friends are the reason why we can get through the hard times, and the reason why we have good times. That might be true. But it doesn’t mean that if you don’t have a tribe, you are doomed to go through life sad and alone – although everyone tries to tell you it does.

People write and speak about how important it is that we find our supportive, and united tribe. And yes, I agree that you should find people who support and love you, but if you don’t have a tribe per say, that’s ok too. We shouldn’t go through life trying to find people to connect with, and feeling like a failure when we cannot find those people. It’s not something that is in your control. Not everyone has a group of friends they have known their whole lives. Some of us just have a few good friends that we hang with, and some may even have just one!

It’s not about the quantity, it’s about the quality. If you find one or two people who truly get you, accept you, and love you for who you are, then that’s it. That’s your tribe.

In life, you’ll come across people who you connect with and sometimes you’ll be close friends forever, and do everything with them, but sometimes you’re close, and then you grow apart, and it’s just that. Life isn’t about forcing friendships, and struggling with people who aren’t really putting in as much effort as you: it’s about accepting people for who they are, and seeing if you click. As long as you surround yourself with people who love you for you, that’s all you need.

A “tribe” isn’t something to strive for.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t seek out like-minded individuals and see if you can form a connection, it just means that if you don’t find your tribe, don’t get down on yourself thinking there’s something wrong with you. Because there isn’t. You’re the perfect you! As my homegirl Daria once said, “I don’t have low self-esteem. I have low esteem for everyone else”. Preach, girl.

Stay bodacious babes.


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